best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
