Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
