does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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