No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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