I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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