Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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