it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
