He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I have already put on my inside pants.
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