i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
