i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
