So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
