How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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