Dual....:-)
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
