If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
