I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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