Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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