If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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