She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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