Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize