i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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