Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
