So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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