I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
