Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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