i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
