I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Vodka?
Forever.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
