they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
