they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize