we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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