come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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