I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
