Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
