I'm really into asian looking animals
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize