naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
