3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I just gift wrapped bread.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize