A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
