I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
