I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
