did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
