Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
It's blow job season.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Randomize
