I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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