you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
