I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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