Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i would punch a child for taco bell
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
