I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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