This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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