it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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