marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
