and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Randomize
