I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
